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When we do, we die. But sometimes we need to quit being our own enemies, and fighting against ourselves."Was he right? Could I stop fighting myself and still face the world? Or myself? For what the shrink was telling me went against everything I had been taught. Yet it was what, in my weaker moments, I had dreamed about and wished for, until I caught myself, and forced the evil thoughts out of my head. We were still silently holding hands when the nurse came in, and chased Michael out while she did my thing with a bedpan. I wondered briefly which was worse, death or bedpans. It was a toss-up.As the sleeping meds slowly kicked in, I wondered if the shrink and Michael were right, and I was my own enemy in this fight. As I dropped off to sleep, I realized I was a casualty of my own friendly fire.When my shrink came in the next day, I was determined to end the battle. One way or another. "Morning, Nickie." He was as usual smiling and cheerful."Cut the crap, doc, and get me out of these. As soon as their mother came in their parents were arguing. They each had there own methods to drown out the yelling. Jason would put on his headphones and get online to game. It was very effective as the sound effects of weapons clashing and hoards of monsters dying blocked the yelling. Kimmy had a different method she would blare her music player and dance. It often got her in a good mood and she would record herself dancing on her web cam. It transport her into a different place one where her family wasnt as dysfunctional as it was. Eventually the fighting ended when there mom left the house and their dad was left in the kitchen. Kimmy walked over to her brothers room to ask for a bit of his stash. Jason would always stash a few candy bars and chips in a duffel bag in his closet. He would have this stash ever since they were young and one particular fight their parents had lasted for a whole day. And Kimmy walked in his room crying holding her blanket and bear in her pjs. Im.
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